In June, my husband became very sick and that turned into 2 weeks in our local hospital and then 2 weeks at UCSF. Thankfully, he is home now and on the mend. A good mend. We have high expectations that all that he's been through will now make him better than before. An underlying problem that has now been taken care of. Yay!
So, what about running? Well, I think I ran 3 times during the 1 month of hospitalizations. If you are a runner, I don't have to tell you how nurturing, how stress relieving it is to run. But what happens when you're facing life and death situations and you can't run? There were days where the fact that I wasn't running was tugging at my mind and my heart. Knowing that I could sure use the stress relief. I could use the cardio. I could use the hospital cafeteria calorie busting, BUT... sometimes you just gotta let it go. And that's what I did. I let it go. I told myself that I was actually creating more stress by stressing over it. I had to give myself permission to not run during this period of time because there was just no way to do it.
So, we are home now and I am getting excited about getting back into my running routine. I'm starting off slow and working it out. This is great! And then it happens. A test ordered by my doctor that points to a hysterectomy is in order for me. Are you serious? NOT NOW!!!!
This is where the power of choice comes in. I can choose to totally be depressed or I can choose to (once again) look to the Lord, process my healing (which has already been accomplished, In Him) and look for the gold.
So here I am, in bed, writing this blog. My uterus is gone (no tears there) and I am processing a positive attitude to get myself back to my running routine as soon as my doctor releases me to do so and I believe that it will be in short order -- like 3-4 weeks. Hey, it's a whole life-time we have so it's what we do over time that counts. I'm choosing to cultivate a healthy mental attitude during this time. I'm going to read some on running and other interests that I haven't had much time for lately.
Maybe you are facing something that seems so insurmountable. Maybe life is not turning out the way you had planned. We have a choice to languish in self pity or we can look outside ourselves and choose to see the tender mercies of the Lord in the midst of our battle. If this is you, I pray that my words will be to you as Proverbs 16.24 - Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, Sweetness to the soul and health to the bones. Basically, I'm making some lemonade. A large, tall glass of lemonade and there's more than enough for everyone!